beyond the natural mind – a 21 day manifesto
Day Seventeen
“Today, I begin to realise that what I project to the world may not be a true reflection of how I truly feel. Today, I will begin to allow the outside to match the inside.”
Just because I smile does not mean I am happy
From a young age we are taught to mask our true emotions, those which we are actually experiencing. Why? Well it helps in the construction of a controlled “civilisation”.
Big Boys Don’t Cry And Other Nonsense
Wherever these expressions started from, you can be sure that it was part of the original control process, a process designed to assign roles to men and women, to compartmentalise the species into easily identifiable traits.
Psychologists may note that “women are more naturally in touch with their emotions”, and “men compartmentalise and intellectualise more;” and whilst it may or may not be true, it does not tell us that it has always been like this since Man first existed on Earth, or whether boys are culturally conditioned from the moment they are born to express themselves in a compartmentalised and intellectualised way. All we know is, we expect women to cry and get upset, and we expect men not to.
But let us step outside of our assigned emotional roles right now, and be honest with ourselves. Let us express something about how we really feel. We all know that we put on a good show for ourselves and everyone else, but no one really knows when we are struggling emotionally (men and women).
We constantly lie, which if you think about it, is the complete opposite of how a complex system should behave. It causes feelings of guilt amongst other things, which eats away at us every minute of the day even if we are not consciously aware of it.
In order to protect the “civilised” world we are taught how to behave, and told to abide by the rules of our society, which have been put in place over centuries and are the definitive instructions on what it means to be human.
But they’re not are they? They are rules to protect the governing powerful elite from “civilisation.”
Civilisation
“The most advanced stage of human social development and organization.”
Given the number of humans actively involved in the oppression and murder of other humans, the murder of animals and fish, the destruction of the natural environment, lying, cheating, polluting, controlling, dominating, and torturing in 2013, I think it’s fair to say that we are not at the most advanced stage of human social development and organisation.
Every day we go to school or work, and whilst we openly tell people that we enjoy our work is that how we truly feel? Are we showing the world our true selves or are we just conforming to an idea? An idea formed externally to ourselves.
How does this idea relate to our emotional selves?
If, like me, you believe that it is our responsibility as humans not to conform to an idea, but to understand our true nature, our role in the creation of all which we perceive, then matching the internal and external emotional state is also part of that responsibility.
So how do we know what our true emotional state is? How can we be sure that what we are feeling isn’t caused by an external, hidden force, such as the idea of shame or honour? How can we be true to ourselves?
“He was quite a happy person. I have no idea why he would want to kill himself.”
The problem lies not in how we perceive ourselves, but that we care how others perceive us. If I alan macmillan orr were a captain of industry, I have to be strong, and never show any weakness, no matter what is going on inside. How would it be perceived if I broke down into tears during a board meeting? It is unthinkable is it not? I cannot tell anyone, so I “soldier on” never showing that I am depressed, anxious, or deeply unhappy with my life.
I keep up appearances that everything is fine, until I cannot contain my emotions any longer and in a fit of desperation decide that I cannot live with myself any longer and commit suicide.
Everyone is shocked, wondering what they could have done to help me, but even they know that weakness cannot be tolerated, that “if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen,” so the culture of “keeping up appearances” must continue. After all, the individual is not important, the company must continue, at any cost.
Man vs. System
The system, which has been created for, by, and through us as humans is deeply flawed, but without it we would not have great inventions, money, healthcare, commerce, education, and government, and we would never have progressed as a species.
So, ladies and gentleman, in order to live in a nice house, with a nice car, well educated children, and enjoy two holidays every year, the cost is keeping your true self in the shadows; to put on a mask every day; a mask which has been carefully prepared for you so you can fit in to the “civilisation,” and if you ever have any internal emotional issues please keep them to yourselves, no one wants to see them.
Much as your boss may say he likes you, he tells you to “leave your personal problems at home, they have no place in the workplace.” But does he not know that everywhere you go you take yourself with you? Apparently not.
If we do not like the system or cannot wear the mask everyday, we cannot share in its benefits and rather than exposing ourself to ridicule, we are encouraged to stay out of it. There is no place for people with problems in this world, so pull yourself together!
If, like me, you are not prepared to put on the mask every day, and do not want to conform to this strange system created neither for me, nor by me, then you have to start to investigate what is going on in your mind.
It is up to us as individual creators to take responsibility for our minds and bodies; no one else is going to do it for us. That is the first step.
The second step is up to you. If you feel that there is nothing you can do to help yourself you must ask for help; reach out to anyone you trust.
The third step is in recognising that no system or organisation has control over you, no matter what anyone tells you.
The fourth step is in creating a life for yourself not a life that has been designed for you. The human race is the most powerful, adaptable species on Earth, and has survived thanks to individual creators, like you, who were not afraid to express their true selves.
The fifth step is in letting go of anything which goes against your better nature.
The sixth step is easy. Live! And enjoy your life. Those who have sought to control you through culture and fixed ideas of how you should live are just jealous that you broke free.
It is high time we all break free of the false idea of being “civilised,” and seek understanding of our true selves. Only then should we be happy to call ourselves a civilisation.
by alan macmillan orr
2012
